Halloween Madness

So today, all of our leftover Halloween stuff went 75% off. So, of course, all the crazies were out and about, ransacking the seasonal department and throwing things around. Its like they see some crappy plastic pumpkin for five bucks and think, oh thats cute but do I really need to spend my money on it? But then somebody else speaks their mind, like, "Oh, what a cute pumpkin! Maybe I'll get it for 75% off!" And then the first person, in a blind panic, realizes its the last cancer-causing plastic pumpkin and they MUST have it before somebody else puts their grubby little mitts on it. I swear, people just buy things to make sure they have it secured in their cart but then realize, hey I don't need or want this after all. I guess now that I'm sure, I can let somebody else buy it. So they stuff it in some random aisle, like between the tissue boxes, and just cause more of a mess for us employees.

Ahh how I love the holidays.

But anyways, thats was really just a side story to my real story here. Everybody knows that Halloween was this last Saturday and, naturally, so was trick-or-treating. Personally, my family bought six bags of candy and we went through all six. (We just happen to have a very busy neighborhood.) However my aunt, who lives in the same town but about ten minutes away, bought four bags of candy but only went through three. And even though she didn't use her last bag of candy, she still kept it. Thats just common sense right there. You do not return food to the store. 

Well not everybody out there in the world seemed to get that memo. Today at work I returned (no lie) at least 50 bags of Halloween candy. And I know people think, hey I didn't use these bags so I'll return them and get my money back! And thats all fine and dandy, but what people don't realize is that I can no longer re-sell the candy you just returned to the store. We cannot put returned food of any kind back on the shelf once it has left the store for safety reasons. The food, sadly, simply gets thrown away.

Yep, I had to throw out at least 50 bags of perfectly good candy. Never been open, nothing wrong with it, but yet, I was throwing out food. And I know its just candy and isn't like I'm throwing out cereal or other non-perishables that could go to a food pantry but still. I'm throwing out food when there are starving children in the world. And all so these greedy people out there can get there two or three bucks back. 

Just keep the candy. Its not going to go bad. Set it out in your home for company or give it out at work or school. Nobody cares that its in a Halloween-themed wrapping. The candy inside is still the same. There's really no need to return food to a store at all.

I'm Not A Mindreader!

Gahh I had such a bad day at work! I really need to vent right now, so here I go...

So this woman comes up to the service desk with two Sterilite storage containers. She pushes them towards me across the desk and says, "One of these is broken and the other one is the wrong size. I got the wrong lids for them anyways." And so she proceeds to hand me her receipt. I, naturally, assume she wants a refund. 

Ok, I am NOT a mindreader people. I go through the entire transaction, I tell her whatever amount of money it was is going back to her Visa, and hand her the receipt back. She doesn't take it back and just stares at me. Actually, its more like a nasty glare but whatever, I won't get into that now.

Anyways, she goes on to tell me, "I did not want a return. I wanted to do an exchange. You never asked me what I wanted to do." Okay, lady, how the hell am I suppose to know this? You watched me do the entire transaction! You couldn't have said anything then? Oh noooo....lets just yell at me afterwards! 

Ok, so trying to stay calm, I say, "Okay, I'll void this and hold these up here for you and you can get the ones you want." And she huffs away.

This mean old hag then returns about a half hour later with two different storage containers that happen to be a dollar more. So when I tell her that she's going to owe $2 then, she snaps on me again.

"I thought they were the same! Where can I find the ones that I got before?"

I try to calmly tell her that I can have somebody help her over by the storage containers but I guess she just got really fed up since she slammed the new ones she just got off the shelf down on the desk and exclaimed, "Fine! I don't want these! Or this lamp either. I'm just going to leave these here and you can take care of them. Just return them."

Ahhhhh that's what I did in the first place!!! Okay, fine. I was breathing very heavily through my nose right now, using all my self-control not to climb across the counter and strangle this bitch. So I returned the storage containers back to her credit card. She then proceeds to tell me, "And I need a raincheck!"

Okay, okay lady. Take a chill pill first of all. And then tell me what item you need a raincheck for. Once again, I am not a mindreader! She then throws a little raincheck stub at me that we scan to then print the raincheck. I go through all of this and give her the raincheck and go through my usual speech of, "This will reserve your sale price for 45 days, yadda yadda yadda" and she just stares at me again.

"How am I suppose to know when this item is in?" She now demands.

Okay, it is NOT my responsibility to call people when items are in. Nor is it my responsibility to make sure sale items are in stock. This is not my fault! I tell her that she's just going to have to come back and check in for the item or call the store. 

And this is where it gets nasty. "You know, you have not been helpful at all. What is your name?"

Even though I have a big ol' name tag displaying my name for the whole world to see, this moron makes me say it out loud. "Great, I will be reporting you to your manager. I am not satisfied and you were not helpful."

Great, so now the bitch is telling on me. Thanks lady. I don't come to your place of employment and bitch and moan about stupid little things I have no control over. Hah. I don't even care. Tell away. 

But anyways, I just shrug at her and say a pretty sarcastic sounding, "Sorry." She then says, "I'm going to accept that as an apology." And then stalks away. I was so NOT apologizing to you bitch. I probably would never apologize to you, even if you threatened my life. You do not deserve my time. I was literally biting my tongue towards the end there so I wouldn't snap completely. 

Meanwhile, my manager was standing there the whole time and he was trying so hard not to laugh. He knows I can have temper issues with the nasty guests. But at least he told me not to worry about it. I know I don't have to, its just so frustrating when people take you for granted! Sorry this is so long by the way, but I really just needed to get my frustrations out. 

I think I'll be a fairy when I grow up...

So not all things at Target at bad. Sometimes I can have a good time, especially when people are being nice or actually appreciate the things I do for them. And sometimes cute little kids can make me smile as well. I'm normally not a kid person. I hate when screaming brats come into the store and then the parents actually buy them something to make them shut up. Hello! That is not good parenting! But when the kids are being cute and calm, I can handle them.

The other day at the service desk, a mom and little kid were returning a Tinkerbell toy because it wasn't working. The little girl couldn't have been older than three and she was really adorable, with little curly blonde pigtails. I asked her if she liked Tinkerbell and she enthusiastically replied yes. I then went on to have an in-depth conversation with a three-year-old about Tinkerbell. 

It was actually pretty great! We both discussed her awesomeness as well as express our jealousy that she has the greatest job in the world when she gets to fly off the top of Cinderella Castle at Disney World during the Wishes fireworks display. We both then decided we were going to be fairies when we grow up. Ahh if only that could come true. 

Well you did have 90 days!

So, at Target, you're allowed 90 days to return something after you buy it. 90 days. Thats three months. Thats a long time to decide if you want to keep something or not. I mean, why would you need longer than 90 days? Obviously if you're not going to use it by the time your receipt expiration date rolls around, you're not going to use it. So just return it. 

Right, so we've established you have 90 days to return. Then why do people insist on trying to return their merchandise after the 90 day period is up?!?! Come on now, most of you are all adults. Hold yourself responsible and just admit that you forgot or you're just too stupid to realize that we have a 90 day return policy. Never mind the fact that there are signs posted EVERYWHERE but still, somehow it always ends up being my fault.

Seriously people? You're gonna turn around and blame your stupidity on me? Come on now. I usually hear "I hate Target, this is just the worst return policy ever, I am never shopping here again" at least 2-3 times a day. Oh, so its only Target, huh? So all those other retail chains out there like Kmart, Wal-mart, JC Penney's and countless others ALSO have a 90 day return policy. 

Gahh some people are just so frustrating! Just do me a favor and save your receipt and return within the alloted time period. Its not hard. Use your brain. If you have one that is. 

I Know How To Do My Job, Thanks

I've come to the conclusion that I hate people. Yeah, didn't have the greatest day at work today. In fact, it pretty much blew.

So I'm at the service desk and this guy comes up to me with (no lie) 18 pairs of shorts to return. Apparently he bought them all at original price and then bought them again when they got marked down towards the end of the summer for the lower price. Okay, fine. People do this a lot since we don't price adjust clearance items. They buy the item at the lower price and return it with the original receipt when they bought it at full price. There's really nothing we can do to stop this if the item numbers match and honestly it really doesn't bother me when you have the receipt.

But when you make me do a receipt-lookup off of your credit card, then its starts to get a little frustrating. Whenever I look something up off of your card, its going to automatically give me the lowest price that you bought it at. There's nothing I can do about that. You need the receipt if you want the original price back. But this guy hands me his credit card and says he needs me to look up this items for him. 

"And I'm going to need you to scan each of these more than once, just to make sure I'm getting the highest price I paid for them. I bought them all more than once when they were marked down," He proceeds to tell me.

So I said, still trying to sound polite and pleasant, "I'm not really allowed to do this off of your credit card when you're trying to return clearance items. I need the receipt."

And this is when he starts to get ugly with me. Seriously, this guy was just plain mean. There's no other word to describe it. "Yes, you can do this. I've never had any problems before. You can do it, its not hard. You just take the tag, scan it three times, and make sure I am getting my full refund back. I shouldn't have to explain this for you, its not hard. And I need you to tell me the price that I am getting back when you do it."

Are you kidding me, guy? Are you really telling me how to do my job? Oh, I'm sorry. I guess I forgot I'm just a mindless moron who chooses to work in retail. You must be smarter than me since I'm behind the counter and you are not. He's probably one of those guys who assumes anybody who works there full-time is either a high-school dropout who got knocked up when they were sixteen or just too dumb to go to college. Yeah, well its not true buddy. And just because you have the college degree and I do not does not give you the right to tell me how to do my job! Or tell me that its not hard. 

Gahh I'm just so frustrated! I did the return for him, only because I really didn't want to deal with him or his ugly face anymore. I had to bite my tongue the rest of the time I was doing the transaction to keep from making snarky comments that were sure to get me fired. I never said another word to him after that. He did say thanks and have a good night. I didn't say anything but in my head I told him to have a good night as well and I hope he gets run over by a bus. 

Couldn't You Have Dried These First?

So this incident actually happened to me over last year's holiday season, but I just thought of it today at work randomly. Today it was pouring rain outside and freezing cold, yet for some reason crazy people out there in the world still came in to shop and, even worse, brought their children out in this weather! Seriously, do you want your kids to catch pneumonia? Parents these days...

Anyways, moving on. Thats not really the point of my story. The point is that when people did come in to make returns today at the service desk, they would leave their soaking wet bags and merchandise on the counter, causing everything at the service desk to just become soaked. I was constantly wiping it down today since every other person would complain about my wet counter. Even though they were also to blame for the wetness. So while I was furiously scrubbing at the countertop today, I thought about last holiday season, when this crazy lady approached me at the service desk.

During the holidays, everywhere in the store is completely busy. There is no way to escape the madness. And service desk this one day was no exception. At least I had one other person up there with me to help control the situations but everything was still a mess and the line was going out the door. I was standing at my register and called for the next person in line to step up.

This frazzled looking woman with two young kids practically stormed the service desk and threw a plastic bag at me with what looked to be filled with different sized towels.

"Are you returning these today?" I asked, trying not to raise my suspicions. Something about these towels just looked off. 

"Yes," She said breathlessly. "I have my receipt. I just bought these this morning and I went home to wash them and when I took them out of the washer, I noticed that the towels were unraveling!" 

Okay, fine. So you bough defective hand and bath towels. It happens, I can learn to deal with that. She had her receipt, so I thought, big deal. I return the towels and defect them out. At Target, we have a defective system with three different colored labels. Yellow defectives get sent back to the manufacturer (usually electronics, like DVD's and CD's), Green defectives get sent out to a donation center (like Goodwill), and Red defectives are thrown out. Usually when somebody returns defective towels they get sent to the donation center, so less fortunate people have the chance to use these items, even though they're slightly defective. 

"Okay," I said to the woman. "I can return them if they're defective."

I take the receipt and the woman turns the bag upside down to dump out the contents. And thats when I realize all of the towels she had purchased were soaking wet. I mean, they were leaving ridiculously deep puddles on the service desk counter. What did she do? Realize when she took the towels out of her washer that they were unraveling, throw the kids in the car, and rush to Target, just to return them? Couldn't it have waited, oh I don't know, a day? I mean, we have a 90 day return policy! At least have the decency to dry the towels first! I couldn't believe this woman was handing me wet towels. I couldn't send these out as a green defective now, to a donation center. They would get all mildewy and smell gross. I had to override them to a red defective because I had no way to dry them. So now these towels that were only slightly defective and still could have been put to good use had to be thrown out. Some things just really irritate me! Its called common sense people. I suggest you grow a brain next time before you go to a store and do something that stupid. 

Break time! Or so I thought...

Break time is probably my favorite time of day. Depending on my shift, I only get a 15 minute break and a half-hour lunch. And I don't even get paid for my lunch. So you can guess that the last thing I want to do at the store is help someone during my (non-paying) lunch. Its my one time of day to have to myself! To get away from the craziness of it all. 

Now I know you're probably thinking, big deal. Just take off your name tag, go back to the break room, and enjoy your meal. The only problem is, that between the front lanes and the break room are guests! They didn't connect the front office to the break room so you have to walk a short stretch of the store to get back there. And it always seems like on that path of toilet paper and tissues is where people always seem to have problems. 

Today, I was walking the dreaded toilet paper passageway to the break room for my lunch. I had already punched out so I was not getting paid, I had taken off my name tag, put on my different colored sweatshirt, had my bag on my shoulder, my lunch bag in the other hand, and I was talking on my cell phone. Now did this stop this one guest from harassing me? No. Of course not.

I had almost made it to the door! I was so close I could taste it. Only three more aisles left. And then I hear it...

"Ma'am!"

I was on my phone so I just ignored it. They couldn't be talking to me anyways, I was on my break. Another one of my co-workers must be around.

Two more aisles...

"EXCUSE ME! Ma'am!" The screeching, penetrating voice was too loud this time. I had no choice but to turn around and acknowledge this woman. I told my friend who I was talking to on the phone at the time to hang on a second.

"Yes?"

This woman was scary. I mean downright frightening. She was older, with wild gray-brown hair, glasses perched on the edge of her nose, and a crackly old voice. She chased me down the rest of the aisle and actually entered my personal space bubble.

"Where are the Halloween-themed Ziploc baggies?!" She demanded.

Whoa, lady take a chill pill. And then pop a Tic-Tac too while you're at it. I stepped back as politely as I could before answering. 

"They're probably back in the seasonal department," I answered. 

"And WHERE would that be?"

Okay, if you don't shop here well enough to know where all of our departments are, then you really don't have to right to be bossing around employees. Especially those who are on their breaks!

"Well the back corner of the store," I said through clenched teeth. My patience was really wearing thin at this point. 

And all I got after going through all this trouble? A nasty snarl. Thats right, no "thank you". No "thanks for your time" or "I appreciate your help". Or even a "sorry to keep you from your break". Nope, just a nasty look with an actual lip snarl. Thanks lady. I hope you suffocate on your Halloween-themed Ziploc baggies.